Staying the same is the most comfortable place to be. Yes, many people say they want to change. That’s why they read the books and attend the seminars. That’s the fun part. Until they find that change is painful.
Someone might ask, “Why is change so painful?” Because we are all creatures of habit. We love predictability and control because that takes away the fear that comes with the unknown, and uncontrollable.
In fact we tend to avoid change even if the thing we need to change from is harming us. That is why a person in an addiction will resist intervention even when they know the intervention makes sense!
So basically the points are:
- Change hurts
- Change is uncomfortable
- Change sucks
- Change is scary
So Why Do We Need Change?
- It is the first step towards growth
Pretty straightforward, but most times before you can become all you are meant to me (or be more), you need to move forward. Change for you might be a change of ideology, habit, way of thinking, relationship. Those things though comfortable and “all you know,” might be the very things holding you back.
- Change prevents death
And I’m not talking about physical death necessarily. I’m referring to mental or emotional death, career death, death of a dream, death of a relationship, even death of who you could be. Let’s pick a light example. Career. You desire to move up in your career – that’s a change. However, before that happens you might need to change the way you present your ideas, the way you communicate with your team, increase your knowledge base, or even change your wardrobe. Sounds easy enough? However it might not be for some people. If this change cannot be implemented the result could be job stagnation or a convenient layoff (death of a career). Apply this example to anything in your life that you sense needs to change.
- Change matures you for your destiny
Everyone has a destiny, a why they are put on earth. It doesn’t have to earth shaking and coupled with fame. A destiny could be being a great parent to the next generation, the parent who stops the cycle of something in the family. It could be being a great friend to someone, the friend that loved so much it changed a life. And yes it could be you are supposed to be the next CEO, or governor, or even president. Whatever your destiny is, it is always going to cause you to influence someone other than yourself. To be a positive, good influence, you will need to mature emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and physically. Change will always, always precede that. Why? Because very few of us humans are ready, set, and go from the womb. Lots of growth is needed in the journey of life.
Nothing good comes easy is a saying that’s wise to take to heart. Change is good, change will be hard work, and it will require focus, discipline, and resilience.
Anyone telling you about a quick fix is taking your money, or about to take your money. The boulder of change will be heavy for some and lighter for others, depending on the needed change, and the incline for transformation will either be a mountain or a hill. Whatever the case, there is a top with a plateau and at some point you will get there.
The steps to change:
- Acknowldge you need change
- No excuses from the beginning
- Make a decision
- Get outside help: support/advice from a mentor, read a book on the subject, professional counseling
- DO IT – “ACTION”
- Be kind to yourself if you fall
- Get up and try again
So, hope you got encouraged to finally face the change, inspired to take the next steps, and excited about what’s you’ll be afterwards.